You Might Be A Writer If—
August 31, 2013
I hope Jeff Foxworthy doesn’t mind if I steal his “You might be a redneck” concept for a humorous look at writing. Without further ado, I present: You might be a writer if…
1) If you spend more money on books than you do on groceries, you might be a writer.
2) If conversations take place inside your mind with imaginary characters, you might be a writer.
3) If you’ve ever left a movie theater and said, “The book was better,” you might be a writer.
4) If someone has ever said something mean to you and your first thought was, “How I can put this person in a story so I can kill them off,” you might be a writer.
5) If you’ve ever stayed up till three in the morning so you could finish writing “just one more paragraph,” you might be a writer.
6) If every time you read a book, magazine, or news item and your mind subconsciously corrects all the grammar, spelling, and punctuation mistakes, you might be a writer.
7) If someone says, “Let’s go look at the stars,” and the first thing you do is check your reviews on Amazon, you might be a writer.
8) If your body goes into convulsions every time you hear the word “edit,” you might be a writer.
9) If the people you admire most have last names such as: Tolkien, Rowling, Feist, Patterson, James, Steel, Evanovich, Grisham, Kinney, Roberts, Kuntz, Meyer, or Martin, you might be a writer.
10) If you own more library cards than credit cards, you might be a writer.
The drugs should be consumed an hour before making love with your partner ensures you a very good experience like never before. levitra 10 mg The disorder has cialis tablets for sale been termed as erectile dysfunction. Order for these herbal pills can be placed cheap brand levitra using a credit or debit card. Taking enough vitamin D- Vitamin D, a steroid canada viagra buy hormone, is essential for the nucleus of the sperm cell, & helps maintaining sperm quality.
11) If you’ve spent more money on give-away swag than you’ve earned in royalty checks, you might be a writer.
12) If you can’t walk across the room without stepping on a book, you might be a writer.
13) If you can operate a Kindle, Nook, or iPad, but don’t know how to use the television remote, you might be a writer.
14) If you’re afraid to leave the house without a pencil and pad because you never know when “inspiration may strike,” you might be a writer.
15) If you’ve spent more than an hour thumbing through a Thesaurus looking for that one perfect word, you might be a writer.
16) If you find yourself correcting the graffiti on public restroom walls, you might be a writer.
17) If you start each prayer before a meal with, “Once upon a time,” you might be a writer.
18) If you’ve ever said, “Who should I make this out to,” when a restaurant server handed you the menu, you might be a writer.
And finally:
19) If you can look at a blank page and see an infinite number of interesting characters, magical creatures, twisting plots, and undiscovered worlds, you ARE a writer!
I hope I made you smile. Until next time, thanks for believing!
I am, without a doubt, a writer. 🙂
Denise
I just found out about you and super excited to read your book!! My husband and I are both book lovers and while I will read anything we both really like the fantasy books!!
This is really good,, Lenny!
Best wishes!
Let me know when the second book comes out — want to review it also.
Forrest